>may i ask why you left the "caliphate"? Finally you ask me something! But my answer can't be as simple as the question. I'll try to resume my answer, but there are many other factors involved. I entered the caliphate 8 years ago, as I said before, because I thought they were the true and only OTO, that followed Crowley who was the natural OHO (how young was I!), and I wanted someone to talk to. I was a convict Thelemite then. So, I entered there as an associate. I wanted to become a true member and get the Minerval grade, but it was difficult to schedule anything with Albion Lodge. Anyhow, my first enthusiasm was dying out the more I knew Crowley. He was a brilliant thinker, with a compelling writing style, but when I read some of his biographies (King, Symonds) I got very aprehensive! So, two years after I became a member, I was not sure if I wanted to live in "The Magical World of Aleister Crowley"! But it is difficult to get away of the Great Beast. Every now and then I picked up one of his books (such as the Book of Lies) and I was completely overwhelmed with it. It was in those periods that I paid my dues to the "caliphate"! Then the Internet came, and it fastened the comunications.
Other Crowleyites I met on the net were very freaky persons, their pages and their "other interests" were all around dark music, heavy metal, satanism, etc. I clearly didn't belong to that world. Also it was your site! I couldn't believe the things I read there. After a lot of careful thinking, I decided to definitely quit. You were, I'm afraid, the final cause! I left the "caliphate" OTO, but I could not leave Crowley. I'm not a Thelemite, at least not in the way Crowley wanted one to be, but I do my best to discover and to do my True Will!
Hi Peter, >What do you understand by "the OTO"? The "Caliphate" or Grant's OTO or >Metzger's OTO or Motta's OTO or Reuss' OTO or Germer's OTO or what? I meant, naturally, a "legal battle" between Grant's OTO and the Caliphate. Do you think we are going to assist to another one of those? I want to clarify one thing. My point of view towards all these things. I think that the study of the history of a secret society is a very fascinating subject, but by main interest in the OTO is not for the order in itself, it's for one of it's members - Crowley. I think he was one of the most brilliant persons in this century. His thinking is clear and some of his writings are among the best ones ever written in the occult field. I do not consider myself a Thelemite, at least in the sense Crowley thought one should be, but I admire his writings and his personallity. Concerning the OTO and it's "spermo gnosticism", personally, I'm not at all interested in sex magic. I am (as I told you before) an associate member of the caliphate OTO. Mostly because, at the time (8 years ago), I thought there was only one OTO (!), and because I wanted to be closer to other persons that I thought shared my ideas.
My position concerning the 1001 OTOs available is this one. The original OTO (non Thelemite), to me has no interest whatsoever. Their philosophy is not original and has not done anything of merit. Crowley, in spite of being expelled by Reuss, he gathered some followers and transformed a semi-masonic society in something much more deep and interesting (just compare Crowleys rituals (as published by Francis King) to the ones existing att Reuss's time (in your web site)). So, I don't care who is the real OHO, or which one is the true OTO. They stand for their merits as initiation organizations. I would like to hear from you concerning this point. Just one more thing. whatever can be the truth concerning the caliphate, it's undeniable that they have done a fantastic job in publishing Crowley's works. The edition of Liber 4 is a proof of that. Rarely I've seen such an editorial effort in publishing *any* kind of book. For that, Mr Breeze is to be congratulated. So, if the Caliphate OTO is not "legally" the one and only OTO, at least one should give them credit for being the best Crowley's editors of our time. Again, I would like to hear your opinion concerning this.
For some time, I wanted to tell you the story of my "initiation" into the IX* degree. If you want to know about it, read on. It's the experience of one seeker, that truly wanted knowledge. I started reading about Crowley when I was 18. I already had read lots of other authors, namely, Fulcanelli, Canseliet, Levi, Papus, Saint-Yves, and others of Alchemistic and Martinist influences. My library, by then, was about 200 volumes (if I remember correctly). That first Crowley book really impressed me. It was the Dover edition of 'Magick'. I began compulsively buying other Crowley's books. I truly liked his style, and the things he was talking about. It was a completely diferent universe. I always disregarded other authors talking about Crowley, because I wanted to know the source of things, I wanted to know the man first, and after that, read what other people had to say about him. One exception must be done to Regardie, which I always liked very much (due to that magnificent book "The Golden Dawn"); "The Eye in the Triangle" is a particularly good book that I took as a reference to Crowley's personality. But one other book was the begining of it all. "The Book of Lies".
I saw it in a bookstore here in L*** and there I read the story of how Reuss met Crowley, and the so told story that the central secret of the OTO was buried somewhere in those 93 chapters. I must say that I, at the time was not a member of the "Caliphate", and hadn't the foggiest idea to what that secret was. So I began to search for it. Firstly I read the book 2 or 3 times. No way. Then, I picked up all the references concerning the secret in all the Crowley books I had (about 12 or more, at that time). with all those notes, it was obvious the sexual nature of the secret. But I didn't know exacly what it was. So I restarted the "book of lies" sistematically, reading every chapter, and every verse, very, very carefully. I selected about 20 possible chapters, and commented profusely upon it. So to say, to me, "The Book of Lies" is one of the very few books in the world in which you can do that, because the way the symbolism is intertwined in it. It's possible to find new puns and meanings each time you read it. Sometimes I was sure I knew it, but then... I could never know. I meditated long time in some chapters, and it was a sort of a voyage to the inside of myself.
I practically dissolved in the metaphors and meanings of the book. This process took more than 2 years. In that period of time I filiated in the Caliphate, and corresponded with Clive Harper of the Albion Lodge to get the Minerval Grade. But as I was a university student, I had no money to go to England, and so it was impossible to do it properly. In my last year as a student, I got myself on a train with a cousin to do the Inter-Rail. We went to Berlin, Paris and London. I sent some leters to Clive, but it was impossible to schedule an Inititiation during the period I was there. But It was in London that it happened. I was furiously looking for a copy of King's Book "The Secret Rituals of the OTO", I naturally landed in the Atlantis Bookshop and I asked for it; They didn't have it. It was a very sought off book, and very expensive. (If it was expensive I didn't want to buy it, I just wanted to peek inside and read "the secret"!) But they had another one that mentioned a lot the OTO, and was also rare, it was "Sexuality, Magic and Perversion" I picked it up, started reading. Yes, it was there. I paid the book (35 pounds! Ouch!), and started reading as soon as I exited Atlantis. When I read about it, it was like a lightning stroke.
Everything stoped. Now lot's of things started making sense. I wandered about London for many hours thinking about everything. I swear you, I was like in a transe. I walked, I moved, talked and heared, but everything was different. To me it was a sort of an initiation. The way things unfolded before me when I knew it, is undescribable. I must say, that all my guesses to where the secret was in the "Book of Lies" were all wrong, but sometimes I was very near its meaning on chapters 15 and 21, if I remember correctly. From then on, I guess you know the rest of the story. I must add that I only got a copy (in photocopies) of the "secret rituals of the OTO" just 3 years ago. I cannot call myself an initiate of the IX* (whatever is the meaning of it), but I can tell you that the revelation of the 'secret' can be a very meaningful event, so I think that in a very very personal way I am a IX* and a proper initiation would make no difference. To me, Initiation, must be something we live, wheter by ritual or by personal experience. I will never trust charters or papers or anything, but I can know an Initiate, when I meet one!
